First off, I want to say that I don’t believe that pregnancy is childbirth is a disease that needs to be “treated”. I do feel it is a natural occurance and human and animals have been doing it for millions of years without the assistance of doctors and hospitals.
With that said…
I get angry when I see and hear debates on how a women should be cared for during her pregnancy and delivery. I hear of so many people that are almost militant about making childbirth less medicalized and more “natural”. I see people going on and on about how a woman shouldn’t get this or that or something or other because it is a natural process that should be allowed to run it’s course. Some even attack women who don’t deliver “the natural way” and say that they shouldn’t have been parents if they weren’t willing to go natural.
Then you see the other half of the spectrum that feel that it should all be done under a doctor’s supervision and in hospitals with drugs and whatnot. These people go as far as to call the other half uneducated stupid crackpots who have no idea what they are talking about. They say that doing it “natural” is old school and unnecessary in today’s world and that it is just so much safer and more intelligent to have your baby in a hospital environment under a doctor’s care.
What everyone seems to be forgetting though is that is really doesn’t matter how your kids’ some into the world. They are going to get here one way or another…what everyone should be concerned about is if mom and baby are safe and healthy. For some, that is at home with a midwife. For others that means being in a hospital under a doctor’s care. My son was born by c-section. It was necessary…I was cared for by a midwife. Both of my sister’s kids were born in a hospital, but natural birth under a doctor’s care. A friend had her girl in a hospital, under a doctor’s care, with no medication. All of our kids are fine, we are all fine. Isn’t that the important thing?
Now, I realize that the safety of mom and baby is always the reason for these views…but I really have to wonder if that is the “real” reason or if people just want others to think the way THEY think. I mean, let’s face it…women have been having babies at home for hundreds and hundreds of years without meds and doctors. At the same time many women and children died. Now many women have their babies in hospitals with meds…but that comes at a cost of emotional distress as many don’t feel like (or where made to feel like) they have no control over anything to do with birthing their own children.
I think everyone needs to find a common ground. That yes, it IS about the health and well being of mom and baby. That some moms are cut out for the at home/midwife birth…and some are not. No one should be made to feel stupid or inferior or unworthy just because of how they gave birth. Like anything else, it should be a private decision made by the mom and her family (i.e. husband/partner).
Maybe she is totally against the idea of birthing at home…maybe that idea scares the crap out of her thinking of all the things that could go wrong. She shouldn’t be made to feel like she made the wrong decision to go to the hospital. The same goes for the woman who chose to birth at home. Maybe she is totally comfortable in her body and would feel better delivering her child in the comfort and safety of her own home. One may need medication, one may not.
Everyone is different and one person’s choice isn’t always the right choice for another person. We need to allow that choice to be made on a case by case basis…and not fault anyone for choosing the path we chose not to take.